こんにちは～

Last week went by too slowly and this weekend too quickly!

I was actually a little busy this weekend.

Friday I was a little nervous because I had to straighten out somethings with my INR class.

I had been dreading going to class all week and really hyped myself up for something horrible to happen.

Of course when I finally did go, the professor didn't seem to care and my group mates either. Everything went smoothly.

After class I had a nice time chatting with a friend and grabbing coffee from Dunkin Donuts.

Japanese went really well too. I am really happy about it because 先生 asked me if I was going to do study abroad. I believe she is the one who decides who will go and to what school. She seemed to take note of my school of choice.

I was really happy to hear this..although that is still far in the future to me! I can't exactly..imagine going yet although I really want to.

Friday night I tried a new restaurant with some friends. I met some new people and had my first experience with eating...

なっと。

I can't really describe the taste properly. I can say confidently that I have never tasted anything like that in my whole life. (Not in the good way either!) It was such a horrible taste to me! (We ate it without rice or any garnishes though, so maybe it would have made a difference otherwise)

The atmosphere of the restaurant was really lovely though! It was dim and had lanterns hanging inside. You could also go upstairs and sit on the floor.

On Saturday I spent most of my time doing laundry. I went to the gym and in the evening went to see a play that my friend was in. It was pretty interesting but a little..hmm..I am very conservative in some ways so some parts of the play made me cringe!

The overall message was really nice however. Afterwards, we went out for sushi and I came back to study a little.

Today looks pretty good. It is already evening..I ate lunch and am about to begin studying again.

おはようございます！～☆

花金ですね！

とてもうれしいです！

今週は。。長いですよね！

I am really thankful for the weekend!

今日がんばりますね！

１１０％！

こんばん「しぶい」のレストランに行く予定です。わくわくしている！



I am really looking forward to eating here tonight!

昨夜妹ちゃんは好きな人が悲しいと言っていました。

Hmm, maybe I shouldn't but I feel bad for him. かわいそうね。

月曜日の夜好きな人とちょっとテキストしていました。

He seemed okay and even a little lighthearted.

I think, somethings I have learned are:

1. To embrace your feelings (sadness, grief, stress, anxiety..) because denying them doesn't help.


2. Blame yourself, feel sorry for yourself..but only for a short time!


3. Let go. Understand that things aren't always in your control and that's okay.


I wish I could do something for him. I just know the feelings all to well.


最近ジュリーアンとよくテキストをしていました。

彼は。。いい男の人です。

ほんとうに！

Really, he is very sweet and overall a good guy.

I am really hesitant to get into anything suddenly, but he seemed to understand.

Now we are just talking and hopefully will meet up again over the summer.

Seems interesting!

じゃ、I need to go make myself look like one of the living again before class!

I feel still really sleepy and drained today.

There is so much to do though!

I wish I could just sleep for the rest of the week and not have to worry about any work.

I feel slightly overwhelmed by it all.

I need to focus, focus, focus!

So much happened this weekend!

Really, I think in my mind I haven't returned to Miami although my body is here!

Where do I start? The drive back home was really long! Originally, my friends and I intended on getting a hotel in Orlando near the convention center.

In the end however, one of my friends stayed in Orlando to visit family and the others came back home with us for the night.

We left around 14:00 Friday afternoon and arrived around 18:30.

It was such a long drive!

I was really happy to see my mom and all weekend she was cooking for us. I think my friends got a great impression of her and vice a versa. 

Key left Friday night to see her mom and the rest of us prepared for the convention on Saturday morning.

I was so wiped out by that night but we were all excited about it.

The guys had decided to stay at the Hilton near the convention center and were talking about drinking after the convention later Saturday night. Sounded pretty good and of course that sparked lots of conversation.

In my mind I was worried about two things:

1. Doing something too straightforward (好きな人がいったから）

2. My ex feeling awkward around me

So, after making a run to Walmart, dying our hair, doing facials, straightening our hair and gossiping like hens, we all passed out.

We didn't end up leaving until Saturday afternoon, around 14:00 or so after quite a bit of debate.

Basically, talk like that.

The drive to Orlando was another hour and a half or so. The traffic was pretty bad.

We had to park a little bit from the convention center and once we got near there were so many people walking around with costumes!

It was very interesting!

So, we didn't buy tickets and get in until about 17:00. We met up with Key and also my ex. Surprisingly everything went well and nothing was awkward. アンドレスはたくさん飲みすぎましたから。

We looked around the dealers room and honestly that was enough for me before I wanted to leave. It was so incredibly crowded! So many people and so much loud noise.

When we reached Andres, Key and I split off for awhile.

During this time we both spoke a little.

アンドレスは、好きな人はEXのりょうに行ったって。







I wasn't angry or irritated, not even surprised! My feeling was slightly sad but I didn't feel as much as I thought I would about it.

The girls were hungry so we took a walk over to Dick's house. Any time is good for Dick's house!

Around this time is when I realized how badly my feet were getting cut by my new shoes. The walk was about a mile but it felt like forever because of the shoes.

We ate, talked and then met up with Andres after.

The tickets for the rave would be available at seven so the plan was to take the drinks back to the room, getting changed and then go.

In reality however, we went back to the room and ended up changing, drinking a bit and talking a lot.

We met some more of Hamza's friends and they were all pretty cool. We chatted and eventually all the guys came back from the pool. They took a thousand years to get ready.

Some of them took a few shots (we were close enough to the con to walk) and others sipped on some beers.

The walk there everyone loosened up. I was originally not in the mood to go to the rave but I reconsidered and am very glad that I did.

During this time both Jennifer and I were gossiping a lot. カイルはちょうかっこいい！

「すごい！かっこいい！」

「Big Bang スタイル見たいね！」

「チョアヘヨ！」

My sister seemed to talk with him the most though which was really fun!

When we got there the limit had been reached of who can enter. We almost all got split up but at the last moment we got inside. Hamza saw a door where people were coming out and we sort of snuck in.

I highly doubt the cops were going to suddenly bust out from nowhere but it still probably wasn't right!

So, once inside we stuck together as a group only for a little bit. We danced around each other for a little until Jennifer brought my attention to this really cute guy who was dancing alone.

I was really shocked and couldn't understand why. My sister and other friends noticed too. She kept pushing me towards him until finally I just decided to go up to him.

"You are so cute, it's a shame you are dancing alone."

"Want to dance?"

Alcohol obviously brings out a much more confident me because I would have never done that in another situation!

I was really happy I did however. He was tall, built nice and danced extremely well!

I was very surprised.

Most of the music was techno and I really didn't know how to dance like that so I just did what I was familiar with...club type dancing.

He followed along nicely and we danced together the rest of the time.

During this time I locked eyes with a couple of my friends (some of my guy friends gave me the thumbs up)

It was really pleasant. About thirty minutes before it ended we went to get water and sit down.

We talked a little and he was really chill. He is a little young (again), lives in Orlando, wants to study nursing, likes R & B, plays guitar, is afraid of heights and is Filipino.

Yep, that is what I learned while we chatted casually!

So, the rave ended pretty early. We walked out together and went looking for our friends. By this time we had all split up.

I wanted to sit and talk with him more to be honest. My friends waited a couple more minutes for me before we would walk back to the hotel. He was about to leave soon anyways.

We sat down and talked a bit more. Eventually he ran into his friend and had to leave.

I asked for a kiss before he left and was pleasant surprised that he was also a great kisser!


For the second time during the day we all went to Denny's. I only got coffee this time but the whole time was really entertaining.

I really like Hamza's friends. All of the girls had stories to tell but we were all waiting for the car ride back.

We sat and chatted in Denny's until pretty late.

We went back to the hotel for only a short time before I drove us home, it was around four in the morning.




When we got back we were all chatting before going to bed.

I was so exhausted. Sunday went by too quickly and we didn't arrive back in Miami until about 22:30 that night.

Overall? It was really fun! I needed a change of scene really badly. Until I reflected on it today, I didn't realize how much I had on my mind before heading home.

It was great getting to see my mom and having home cooked meals.

It was really wonderful seeing all of my friends letting loose and having so much fun too.

I met a real sweetheart too. I am going to try and keep in touch with him, so we will see what happens.

Everyone keeps asking for a picture so without one the best way I can describe him is he reminds me a bit like Daesung in the face.

He is super cute!

As far as other things go, well, I am torn about it. Happy for him and sad for him. I know how painful it was leaving the person I cared a lot about so often for months at a time.

It is so tough. He plays really cool about it but I know he must be hurting so much.

Yesterday I felt like I took in a slight wave of sadness from it. Maybe it is better to say that I felt like I could feel that pain I had before again. The pain of separation. It is really tough. I really feel for him, because it's painful.

As for my feelings? I guess it makes things a little easier for me because there is no ambiguities anymore. I just hope he finds happiness.

Yesterday I felt exhausted and still in Orlando. Today I must focus and work harder.

I have so many things on my mind but if I focus everything will work out.

あなたに会いたい。。

今めっちゃあいたい。。

Today I think my sleepiness finally hit me. Really, I completely crashed.

I didn't hear any of my alarms and I had no motivation to get out of bed either.

Really, I had no motivation to leave my bed. 

The night time has been a little difficult for me too the past few nights. 

I keep getting an overwhelming feeling and restlessness.

I feel super lonely too and it doesn't seem to matter if I speak to someone or not.

It isn't anything new and I sometimes just begin to feel this way.

I usually just need to sleep it off though.

Today I had a quiz that was pretty stressful. Thankfully the review was very helpful and after class I even hooked up with a friend to start studying for the midterm exam.

Overall though I need to catch up a little. I just feel overwhelmed in this sense because I feel like I have so much to do in the near future and not exactly sure where to start.

I know that it is this feeling that is intimidating me into even beginning the harder parts of the work.

I really need to focus my time and energy a little better though. 

After class I also stayed back with some friends to chat a little. To be honest, the conversation grew quite heavy.

I was really reminded of how young I am, how long I have to go and also how small I am compared to the huge world.

It wasn't intimidating but I felt a lot of my friends burdens suddenly shifting onto my shoulders. It made me reevaluate what I considered "problems" as well.

It was refreshing to hear such confident and head strong people talk. I am usually not surrounded by it and although I couldn't relate fully I felt really interested.

My mind is still a little numb after talking with them to be honest. 

Tonight and tomorrow I have some very important goals.

I feel like one of my weaknesses is ignoring certain things when they became difficult. I will ignore them in the meantime until the very last minute and make things twenty times more difficult for myself. 

So, tonight I want to work a little and focus my mind. Tomorrow I also want to study and take complete advantage of the day. I am leaving for the weekend so I really need to be focused.

こんにちは～

Over the weekend my friend and I baked a lot of cupcakes for Valentine's Day.

It took all Sunday but they turned out great!

I really didn't do too much over the weekend though, instead took some time to rest.

On Sunday I also studied a lot with a friend for our Japanese exam today.

I think it went really well! I think he feels pretty confident about it too.

Every exam I make a "challenge" to review for the test. My friend takes it and we study together.

So far it has proven As! I always feel really proud of him though and at the same time I am studying while compiling this challenge.

It is good practice for me too.

So, although many things are pretty sweet right now, there is still a little bit of bitterness.

I am nervous and happy about tomorrow. My feelings have been all over the place lately.

Just when I feel one way something changes and so do my thoughts a little.

好きな人は。。

I think I know what is logically right to do but I feel differently.

バレンタインデーを考えすぎますよね。

Even though I do not have a Valentine I am still thinking about it in a good way.

I think the holiday can be really sweet.

Plus, I am giving out cards and hopefully a baked treat.

I think I have finally decided what I will make too!

It is exciting

Hm, but, my perfect Valentine's Day gift?

花と携帯ストラップを貰いたいです。

Kind of silly right? I think I would like that though..

それから、その夜カフェーに行きます。

We could talk about the day, work and classes.

My head is somewhere else now..

ユンホさん、バレンタイデーで何をしますか。

今日そうじして、りょうりしました。

Really that is all, sadly! Cooked and cleaned.

友達も話していました。彼女と別れった。

かわいそうね。

I made a kimchi, vegetable, rice and tofu stew.

It came out pretty good actually!

よかったです。

Yepp.

Yesterday was good. 

I slept in and stayed in my room mostly. On Thursdays, I think it is fair to say that I just rest in my room all day.

Regarding relationships..

More than one person has told me "you need a really nice guy, you deserve a great guy."

"Who is..."

どうしようかな。。

最近新しいカメラを買いました。

バレンタインデーの写真です。

I am still learning how to use the camera and the settings. It is my first SLR camera and I have so much to learn.

Recently, I took a few Valentine's Day inspired photos.

どうですか。