あぁ~　悲しみよさようなら...

These are just some lyrics from the song "Honey Vanity" by Kozi. It's one of my all time favorites.

The chorus changes every other time, "Ah, sadness Hello!" and "Ah, sadness, farewell!"

I think everyone knows this feeling and the song is so catchy.

Lately, my sleep has been very difficult. When I get home I feel very tired.

Almost every night I go to sleep around midnight, if not later. I'll lay down way before that though and just lay awake thinking about things. One hour seems like lifetimes just lying awake, you know?

Last night my dreams were troubling. I'd just like a big glass of wine so I can just fall asleep some nights.

I feel happy that graduation is so soon. Today I got that first feeling after completing my Spanish and government exams.

I was thinking...wow, I really never have to come back to this classroom again? To be honest, it was more of a good feeling that a sad one. I am ready to move on past high school (not to say I wont miss some things) but I feel happy to start a new chapter of my life, so to speak.

Tomorrow I don't have to go into class right away. I have two exams, French and AP English.

Hmm..I need to study a little tonight or tomorrow morning. My sister wants to go to eat early, early, this morning so we might do that when my mom gets home from work.

I'll probably bring somethings to study, to be honest.

With everything that has been going on, I've been thinking a lot lately.

What kind of adult will I be? What kind of person will I become at University?

I don't consider myself too childish, I've always been mature, but I have a lot of years to go too.

I wonder if I'll be more organized and work harder. I wonder if I'll be a workaholic like my parents...to be honest, that's part of the person that I want to become.

I have an idea of what I want to be and what I think are good qualities in people. Do you want to know them? I think most are qualities of a leader.

Working hard, strong discipline, giving back by volunteering, generally not complaining...

I like that idea of a controlled person. I want to be seen in this way in the future. I want to become a better me, you know?